Hello new subscribers! I am overjoyed to have you here. This newsletter is a weaving of land, spirit, body, creativity, and the full spectrum of the human experience. Enjoy!
Every year, I write a newsletter about Lent.
I don’t even traditionally practice Lent, but the principle and energetic of it is so important and moving to me. The way that we can look deep within during this sacred window and see what gold there is to mine in the shadows. The way in which all the “extra” is taken away. The way where we surrender to the limbo, knowing that both the sorrow and the joy are on their way.
Every year, the Lenten inquiry changes. And this year, my question has been around where I allow additional suffering to arise. Where I make space for the second arrow.
The second arrow in Buddhism is the notion that there are two levels of suffering. The suffering itself, and the stories, burdens, and patterns that we add to it. This isn’t to say that suffering is optional - I personally do not endorse that notion - rather, it is a reflection on where we bring additional pain to an already painful reality.
There are things happening in my life at the moment that are out of my control. There are big changes and big questions and as of yet, no big answers. This is an advanced pose to hold - the staying open in the unknown, the greeting of the day with what is.
On a daily basis, I find myself seeing many places I could be allowing the second arrow in. The additional layer of guilt or shame after an argument. The voice in my head worrying about my health. The stories I make up around people and why they do what they do.
When we invite the second arrow into our lives, we eliminate space for what simply is.
When I allow myself to be with these facts, the other layers of suffering dissolve.
An example: I don’t need to go into “oh my god, I can’t believe it has taken me so long to go to the dentist, I don’t know how I am going to afford it, what if other teeth need to be worked on, etc.”. I can simply be with the reality that tooth #13 has a broken crown and needs a replacement. I can be present to the fact that it will be expensive. I can sit with my discomfort and fear around the dentist.
From this place, so much of the charge diminishes. Similar to mindfulness meditation, we can greet each issue with equanimity. Our problems don’t need to take up as much space as they do - we can be more open palm and less closed fist.
Life is hard sometimes. Filled with pain and suffering. The least we can do for ourselves in not bring in anything extra. We can open to the reality that is in front of us with grace and acceptance. We can tend to ourselves with gentleness and care. We can acknowledge that so much is out of own hands yet we have the capacity to invite more softness and joy into our experience.
MY INVITATION:
Make a list of the big problems you currently have in your life
Speak each one out loud and allow yourself to talk about it. You will probably have a lot of parts come up, a lot of worries, etc. so let it all be shared.
Return to the list and speak each one out loud. This time, after saying the problem, end with saying “that is simply a fact.”
Feel the difference in your system when bringing in more neutrality. Does your chest seem lighter? Do you feel calmer? Notice the shift in sensation.
READING:
For my recent read for My Year of Fiction (something I created for myself to get out of the vortex of nonfiction reading and back into creative play), I read The Water Cure. This book was beautiful, haunting, and what some might call “fever dream” literature. A dystopian tale of three sisters living a very strange life on an isolated island. It kept me gripped to the page and is definitely worth reading if you like weird girl books (one of my favorite genres).
WATCHING:
I am definitely not a sports tv/movie fan. It just isn’t my thing. But I was encouraged to watch Quarterbacks and it was really moving. It looks at three of the most important quarterbacks in current football - Kirk Cousins of the Minnesota Vikings (a sweet Christian dad whose wife picks out his outfits), Marcus Mariota of the (at the time of filming) Atlanta Falcons (the first Polynesian to ever win the Heisman trophy), and of course the Kansas City Chiefs’ darling Patrick Mahomes (Go Chiefs forever and ever!).
What I found fascinating was how different each of these players are. Not just in terms of them as people, but in terms of the archetypes they inhabit, the burdens they carry, and the ways they navigate having one of the hardest jobs in sports. Even if you don’t care for sports media, I recommend you try an episode and get pumped.
LISTENING:
This song is best listened to while:
a) twirling barefoot in the grass
b) dancing in front of a window with the sun upon your face
c) on a road trip with your head out the car window
OTHER DELIGHTS OF LIFE:
helping people write their advance directives. peanut butter filled pretzels. the feeling when you are half awake in the morning and your body feels deeply comfortable. an incredibly nourishing and inspiring sex writing retreat taught by Raechel Anne Jolie. cotton candy sunsets. cheering my friends on when they make money. a 100 year old fig tree outside of my door. receiving such caring reflections on my writing and my work in general. jasmine milk tea with brown sugar boba. listening to podcasts that inspire me. ASMR videos about wooden makeup (it’s a thing and it’s amazing!). getting back into thinking about quilting (I can’t current quilt due to logistics, but it feels great to just be in that state of mind again). flaky chicken pot pie. fresh air. kisses. winks. the preciousness of it all.
🌺 LAST CALL FOR BLOOM!
BLOOM is a three month deep dive into the medicine of the flowers. Together we will explore ecological energetics, Ayurveda, Traditional Chinese Medicine, homeopathy, mythology - all within the realm of flower essences.
Flower (and plant/gem) essences are some of the most potent medicines I use. In the realm of essences, we are working with issues at the subtle level. We deepen our perception of our own fields and the fields of others. We surrender to the timing of gentle medicine, rather than jumping to the next magic bullet.
I have been working in the realm of flower essences for more than 20 years and it is one of my favorite ways to encourage the innate healing nature of the mind, body, and spirit. There is no need to force - sometimes the smallest interventions create the biggest changes.
You will learn and practice using flower, plant, and gem essences for physical, psychological, emotioinal, and spiritual healing. From babies, to animals, to the dying - this realm of medicine is for everyone and everything. You will learn how to create your own flower essence apothecary and commune with the medicine in a unique and embodied way.
Materia medica, embodiment journey, creative practice and field assignments are some of the ways we will play.
ONE SPOT LEFT! We begin tomorrow - find out more in the site below and reach out to say YES 🌸
✨ CLOTH OF THE CROSSROADS: A Burial Shroud Desert Retreat ✨
CLOTH OF THE CROSSROADS is an honoring of life and death through alchemical art. A return to connection with the natural world. This journey is a walk through the mystery, as you gather the talismans to create a burial shroud for yourself or for a loved one.
Our time together will be a weaving of making art, connecting to our bodies, communing with nature, exploring the death realm, and gathering in ritual.
You will learn and practice a variety of modalities and techniques for shroud making such as: quilting, dyeing and printing with natural dyes, beading, embroidery, collage, drawing, and painting. You will leave the retreat with a fully constructed burial shroud and the skills to create more in the future if you so desire.
This retreat is for you if you who are interested in making a burial shroud, if you are wanting a deeper connection with death medicine, if you are an artist (which spoiler alert, is everyone!), or if you are a deathworker who wants to be trained in this realm of the path.
In addition to learning technique and creative practice, we will have daily embodiment journeys, hiking through Joshua Tree National Park, a “living funeral”, and a sound bath at the famous Integratron.
There is NO other retreat like this out there. This is a weaving of the artistic and the ecological. The embodied and the liminal. A place where creativity, spirit, body, and land dance together.
CLOTH OF THE CROSSROADS is from May 23 - 27 and is $2,500 which includes beautiful accommodations, organic farm to table meals, and all supplies and art materials to make a professional burial shroud.
I only host this pilgrimage once every few years and I am keeping it to six people so it will fill up! Four spots left - find out more below and apply soon ☠️
A blessing: May your way this weekend be easeful and filled with exuberant joy!
XoXo Binyamina Aisha
This is beautiful and such an extremely helpful reminder 🙏🏻 and thank you for the love, so happy you were at the workshop💗